My colleague shared this with our leadership team and I found it interesting. Do agree? What are your thoughts?
What I Learned
I’ve learned – you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved.
I’ve learned – no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.
I’ve learned – it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
I’ve learned – it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.
I’ve learned – you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.
I’ve learned – it’s not what happens to people that’s important, it’s what they do about it.
I’ve learned – you can do something in an instant that will have consequences for the rest of your life.
I’ve learned – you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I’ve learned – either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I’ve learned – regardless of how steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.
I’ve learned – learning to forgive takes practice.
I’ve learned – money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I’ve learned – sometimes I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.
I’ve learned – true friendship continues to grow. Same goes for true love.
I’ve learned – maturity has more to do with what you’ve learned from your experiences and less to do with how many years you’ve lived.
I’ve learned – you should never tell a child their dreams are unrealistic. What a tragedy, if they believed you.
I’ve learned – no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you and you will have to forgive them.
I’ve learned – it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you need to forgive yourself.
I’ve learned – no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.
I’ve learned – just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other and just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.
I’ve learned – you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I’ve learned – no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt too.
I’ve learned – there are many ways of falling and staying in love.
I’ve learned – even when you think you have no more to give, you find the strength.
I’ve learned – credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I’ve learned – the people you care about in life may be taken from you too soon.
I’ve learned – two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I’ve learned – our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I’ve learned – most people don’t listen to others to try and understand but they listen to reply.
I’ve learned – it’s taking me a very long time to become the person I still want to be.
A year ago I never would have thought how much taking on the role of Collegiate Representative would affect me. I knew it would be a challenge, but my want to serve my collegiate sisters out-shined all doubts or concerns that I may have had.
To my Collegiate Sisters,
It has truly been a pleasure serving as the voice of you all, I thank you so much for entrusting me with such a precious task. Within entering into this position my goals were to justly speak on your behalf to the National Board, stay connected on a National level, and ultimately experience growth within our Sisterhood.
While I would have loved for all of my wants to be fulfilled in the vision that I set for them, I am so happy to see that we are all making the necessary steps to fulfill our mission as an organization. Of course there is always more work to be done but I am glad to know that within progress is success. I love you all and have no doubt that our sisters Jakia and Martine will do an amazing job in continuing with the growth that we have experienced this year.
To the National Board,
I learned so much from you all. From a business perspective I gained knowledge in event planning, responsibility, and ultimately how it is to work with fellow strong minded black women.
Four years ago it was the support, inspiration, and motivation from older sisters that caused me to fall in love the Black Female Development Circle Inc.
While at first I was nervous to see if I would receive the love on a national level, I am so blessed and thankful to say that my doubts were invalid. You all supported me in by far one of the toughest times of my life, not because you felt like you had to but because you wanted to and I don’t think you will ever understand how appreciative I am of that. You all give me inspiration knowing that in the midst of life obstacles that God will always be there and so will you.
Thank you all.
Well it is finally time for me to say good bye…
…That was a little dramatic lol, See you all in Washington!
If you have a desire to empower, educate, and inspire women on your campus and in your community, the Black Female Development Circle, Inc. is the organization for you! As a reminder, National Dues are due on October 1, 2014. If you desire to be a member of one of our collegiate chapters for the 2014-2015 fiscal year, please refer to the instructions and deadline reminders below:
- National dues must be paid by October 1, 2014 (through the collegiate chapter on your university’s campus)
- National Chapter Membership dues are $25 per person.
- A late fee of $5 will be assessed from October 2, 2014 until October 30, 2014.
If you desire to register as an Alumni/At-Large Member for the 2014-2015 fiscal year, please click on the link below to fill in your registration information. After you submit registration, a PayPal invoice will be e-mailed to you. Please review the deadlines and instructions below:
- National dues must be paid by October 1, 2014.
- National Membership dues are $35 per person.
- A late fee of $5 will be assessed from October 2, 2014 until October 30, 2014.
We are looking forward to another year of our members furthering the mission of BFDC by educating, exploring, enhancing, and celebrating womanhood!
I overheard something VERY disturbing today. I was in a store and two young women were talking. I heard one of the women say “I am so blessed God gave me the man of my dreams!” (I continued to listen because I wanted to hear more about her happiness). The woman continued her statement with “I love him but he just needs to hurry up and leave his wife!” her friend followed with “He will soon…just be patient.”
I was very disappointed by what I heard not only because of the woman who made the statement but also because of the woman who was encouraging her. It broke my heart that this woman clearly did not have enough self-respect to realize she was settling for less than any woman deserves. Because I am a Christian woman I was even more appalled that she mentioned God led her to this man who was someone else’s husband.
As humans I understand we all make mistakes but as women we HAVE to do better with supporting and uplifting each other in our times of need. As a woman, in my opinion, we should never encourage each other to do harm to ourselves or other women. We already have double standards that we fight against every day because society places them on us. Let’s not fight and tear each other down as well. Building our self-respect must start somewhere so let it start with YOU.
There has been a time in all of your lives that we have heard the phrase “Think Before You Speak.” With all the controversy in the news and in our personal lives this week I want to reemphasize the importance of observing your audience. This week wait 5 to 10 seconds to respond to your audience when having a conversation. Really take the time to listen and decide on a response. When given the opportunity to share your thoughts observe your audience, remember the steps below, and hopefully you will not have to apologize for something you meant to say. Have a great week.
Recognize Your Situation
Observe the Conversation
Observe the People
Consider the Information
Is the Information Effective, Necessary, Accurate, Timely, and Appropriate?
Gauge the Reaction
Be Thoughtful About Your Tone
Have you ever woken up one morning and just knew you were not the same person as the day before? I know figuratively we always say development and growth is constant but have you literally felt different? Maybe it was after some triumphant or tragic event. Maybe it was after a conversation you had with a friend or significant other or maybe you just got up one day and said “I am not the person from yesterday.” I can tell you that it is quite a weird feeling however if we pay close attention, we outgrow our former selves a few times over the course of our lifetime. The question is can we let go?
One of the hardest things I have ever had to do as an adult was to be just that—an adult. The decisions I would make as a teen would no longer satisfy the needs I have as an adult. Slowly but surely I felt myself changing, outgrowing certain things, vices, and people. My mother would always tell me “Every level has a new devil.” I didn’t understand as a child but boy did it hit me as an adult. At each phase of my life I had to deal with some new issue and it was up to me to take care of it. The most difficult “devil” was letting go of certain people in my life. I was such a people-pleaser, always wanted be everyone’s friend but I had no idea how much it was taking a toll on me. I had outgrown the people that took me for granted, those that used me, and those that really didn’t wish me well.
At this very moment, as I write this blog, I am again having that feeling of being different. My life is going through several changes and I understand that in order to successfully get to the next phase, I will have to outgrow my former self. I encourage you, my sisters to pay close attention when your life go through these inevitable transitions. What/Who can carry along with you? What/Who will have to remain?
“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”
Why is it that so many people have a strong desire to make a difference and be important (often for all the right reasons), but very few make it to the level of acclaim that they desire?
There is a school of thought that teaches that you can be and do anything you believe you are capable of being or doing. Some have interpreted that to mean that as long as they tell themselves it’s possible, then the hard part is over. But, often, there is a huge difference between what we tell ourselves and what we actually believe.
Do you really believe you’re worthy, or do you just wish for your big break? Watch this Ted Talk featuring Brene Brown and ask yourself if your actions indicate worthiness or wishful thinking.
It’s wonderful to know that we as black women can come together to build such a beautiful connection with one another. That is one thing I love about the Black Female Development Circle. We are there for one another to help whenever needed yet I find that sometimes we forget that we have this wonderful resource. We can’t all be super woman all the time and try to handle everything on our own. Sometimes we just need to realize that life can be overwhelming whether you’re planning an event or dealing with the stress of a class. That is the best time to lean on your sister and allow them to help you. Don’t worry about getting on someone’s nerves because there will be a time when they will need you too. You will be surprised to learn how willing most people would be to help you. So lean on me and I will lean on you and we can achieve something greater together than we would alone.
The 7th Annual Purple Power Seminar
“Obeying the Traffic Signs of Life”
Who’s Going to Stop Me?
As all the chapters return to school I hope you all remember some of the principles from Purple Power.
We had an excellent time and I hope everyone is fired up for the semester ahead. The opening activity gave us a chance to reflect on “The Power of Now.” Through this activity we are encouraged to live in the present, not let the past or future define your today, take time out to smell the roses, learn what life is trying to teach you in this stage in your life, and do not over-think it. Our workshops were both informative and spiritually edifying. I hope each of you will share your personal experience with the other members in your chapter. The speakers inspired us to use the traffic signs of life as a warning to prepare for what is ahead, adapt the 5 factors of success, and think outside of the box. We have been encouraged to define ourselves for ourselves.
Let us pay close attention to the Traffic Signs of Life.
1. I hope you all eliminate things approaching a dead end.
2. Remember, when making big change you may not be able to bring all of your stuff.
3. Don’t allow yourself to be boxed in; when you look in the mirror try to see yourself as God sees you.
4. We are all wonderfully created, and successful beyond measures.
Have a great semester, until we meet again in Washington, DC for the National Conference!!!!!
It’s that time of year again!
Yes! Purple Power has come upon us once again!
There are 6, (count ‘em) 6 DAYS until Purple Power!
On behalf of the National Board, I would just like to say how EXCITED we are to bring to you the 7th Annual Purple Power Seminar “Who’s Going To Stop Me? Obeying Life’s Traffic Signs”.
This year’s seminar will be hosted at the University of South Florida in Tampa, Florida, which is also home to our newest BFDC chapter!
Join us as we take a deeper look into our organization as a whole, listen to THREE guest speakers, participate in a workshop facilitated by one of our very own and most important of all, bond with our sisters from other chapters.
We look forward to seeing you there! Let’s paint Tampa Bay PURPLE!
National Director of Special Projects